14 posts tagged “idiots”
After a (sort of) less-than horrible experience of last-minute Christmas shoppers last week, I was actually prepared to write up a post about how surprisingly... nice people (well, most) can be.
Hell, it was even to the point that I could smile without it looking forced at all. And speak in a (kind of) cheerful-ish tone that wasn't completely made up and creepy.
Then... well, today pretty much reminded me why I was a misanthropist.
First off, hagglers - conversations basically go like this:
Customer: [places item on counter]
Me: Hi. [presses keys on the register] That'll be $X please.
Customer: I thought this was a/The $2 shop. (First mistake - This place ain't a $2 store. We sell stuff for that price, yes, but just because this place is classified as a 'discount shop' doesn't mean that EVERYTHING is $2.)
Me: Um... No. This store is called "Max! Out", and it sells things more expensive than $2.
Customer: Oh. Could you lower the price to $2, then? (Note: This is either worded as a question or a demand.)
Me: Um... No. I can't do that.
Customer: [stares]
Me: I'm sorry, but I cannot do that. I am not the manager of this store, and therefore do not have the power to do so.
Customer: Fine. I'll just go to the other $2 shop upstairs/on the other side of the mall. [exuent]
Then, the most infuriating and tears of frustration-inducing people would be the goddamn shoplifters.
Most of them come in groups and are roughly aged between 10 to 18. Again, mostly male.
Today was especially frustrating because I know what they stole, but can't really do anything because I don't know which one stole the damn thing and where the shi... person hid it.
To top it off, a more sympathetic customer actually told me that those people were shoplifting, but I couldn't exactly do anything because of above reason.
One kid even stole a lighter. I'm more worried of what that kid will do with it.
I really felt like breaking down and crying.
I still do, actually.
Funny. Every time something remotely good happens that makes me appreciate humanity a little more, something else happens that make me remember just why I hated people in general.
That's it. I give up. I'm not even going to bother trying to regain my faith in humanity. C'est mort.
On a less stressful note, at least once a day, there are Chinese people who, because I'm asian, assume that I'm Chinese (or speak fluent Mandarin) and speak to me in that language. Cue my interruption and awkward reply of "Sorry, but.. um.. I don't understand."
The situation becomes more awkward when they either don't understand English or think that I'm only pretending that I don't understand, and continue to talk to me in Mandarin.
Eventually, after repeated gestures and more awkward silences, the person leaves.
To those who know what I look like: Do I look Chinese? I've been mistaken for one by not only non-asian groups, but even Koreans. It's... unsettling, to say the least.
To be honest, I've been in said Retail Hell since the first of December, but couldn't be bothered didn't really feel I needed to say much.
However, having worked here in Max! Out (Not a typo) for what can tentatively be considered a week, I can (not-so) happily announce that I will one day look back on this experience and shudder. Or laugh hysterically, depending on my state of mind at that point in time.
General statements I'd like to make:
- As crazy as it may sound, it is not hilarious if you half-jokingly ask for a "100% discount for the Christmas Season". Funnily enough, some people have the same sense of humour as you, and will ask the sales clerk the SAME. BLOODY. THING.
- On the flipside, it is considered rude and downright stupid if you ask, in all seriousness, for a discount. In a freakin' discount store.
- If you break/destroy/pop/ruin an item, common courtesy states that you should tell the sales clerk about it. Depending on how sincere you sound, they may or may not let you off the hook for honesty.
- NO. WE DO NOT SELL BB GUNS.
An expanded version of this post may or may not come, depending on whether or not I can be bothered motivated able to do so.
In an act of sheer brilliance stupidity, I have managed to prove that it is possible to get a papercut. From very blunt cardboard. And it stings.
.. Seriously, how is that even possible?!
So. After Armageddon (which was totally awesome, if not for the fact that I spent like $200 there :<), I found that I was to start working from Sunday until the Sunday before school starts.
Crap.
Also, today I read a letter I got from Vic Uni. The strange thing was that although my name's written correctly at the front on the inside my name is Lyle (?!). Then, I realised that there was a progress report along with my newsletter, so I took a look-see there.
A little disappointed with French, but otherwise happy. Now then, onto the retail hell (because those who read this willingly are weird sadists and I appear to enjoy ranting).
My work hours are from 9.00am 'til 5.30pm. Slightly longer than a regular school day, so no complaints so far.
Anyway, gripes, gripes... where to start...
First off, there was that obligatory hag woman who assumed that because IM AZN I CANT SPEEK ENGREESH LOLZ and so had to request what she wanted veeeery slooooowly. Naturally, due to this I understood even less, and frustration got the better of her and as a result she left. Hooray for misperceived language barrier!
Then, there were the little shi brats who tried to steal capguns. My dad eventually kicked them out, but paranoia settled in right after that.
... And then, there was that slightly disturbing conversation I had yesterday (Thoughts are in italics):
Old lady: Hi. How are you? :D
Me: Um... Good? ^_^;;
This is... odd. Nothing unusual, though, so I better be nice and smile back.
Old lady: So, how's the baby?
Me: ... O_o
I HAVE A BABY?! WTF?!
Old lady: ...? *Waits for reply*
Me: Er... I beg your pardon? Baby?
HOW OLD DOES SHE THINK I AM, ANYWAY?!
Old lady: ... Wait, you're not that lady I talked to often, are you?
Me: Er... no?
Then, there was a separate incident after that involving my dad this time:
Old man: So, are you the husband of that woman who had that baby?
My Dad: What?
Old man: ... You're not, are you?
... Man, yesterday was all kinds of awkward.
"A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti." - Hannibal Lecter, from The Silence of the Lambs
At... what, 4 in the morning, I'm hardly surprised at this.
Anyway, here are two songs that I've been listening to lately.
Again, gamers should be familiar with this guy. I really don't know how to describe him. Almost unbelievable how sad this man is to ambulance chase pretty much every single teen shooting/massacre that occurs on the news.
... As long as it isn't that John McGrath idiot.
First off, the guy looks like a complete jerk. To me, he seems like one of those guys who are much more better off than you, and brags it to the nearest uninterested person around him.
Namely, You.
His 'Vote for me' adverts piss me off the most. These quotes are directly taken off his site (And directly under them are my thoughts):
My next concert is in Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor – Madonna
Quite frankly, I couldn't care less for her music.
I’ll play for the Wellington Phoenix if John McGrath is Mayor – David Beckham
Considering the fact that I think Beckham is overrated and annoying, it doesn't exactly make me want to vote for McGrath. Plus, has any non-fan even heard of the Wellington Phoenix?! I never even knew we even had a soccer team in the first place!
We’ll bring the Rugby World Cup to Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor – The All Blacks
Who the hell cares?!
The Next Americas Cup is in Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor – Bertarelli
Never heard of you, never will. Shut up.
I will move Microsoft Head Office to Wellington – if John McGrath is Mayor – Bill Gates
Um, no thanks. I really don't see any point in having Microsoft Head Office here.
I’ll be found live and well in Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor – Elvis Presley
Elvis is DEAD. And considering his unhealthy diet, it's hardly surprising he kicked the bucket, so to speak.
We’ll move to Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor – Wills & Harry
No thanks. The novelty of having Royalty stay in Wellington will wear off in a matter of 2 weeks at most.
The Olympics will move to Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor - The IOC
What's the point? And besides, where the hell is it going to be held? I highly doubt the Wespac Stadium would do for events in the first place.
I’ll do my time in Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor – Paris Hilton
I'd rather not have that bitc ... woman within a 15km radius near me. Knowing that she's near me will give me enough nightmare material to last me a year.
My next Wedding will be in Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor – Liz Taylor
... Who?
We’ll declare Wellington a centre of world peace if John McGrath is Mayor – Nelson Mandela
I consider this a complete insult to Mandela's general awesomeness.
The next Playboy mansion is in Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor – Hugh Hefner
FOR THE LOVE OF-
NO
My next apprentice is John McGrath – Donald Trump
No one gives a damn. Besides, doesn't this mean that McGrath is the only person who gets the money?
Kerry you’re fired. – Donald Trump
.... Qui?
I’ll move to Wellington if John McGrath is Mayor. – Dick Hubbard
Again, who the hell are you?
I’ll move the prevailing nor wester to Auckland if John McGrath is Mayor – GOD
"You shall not make wrongful use of the name of the Lord your God, for the Lord will not acquit anyone who misuses his name." - Exodus 20:2-17
I'll buy CrazyHorse if John McGrath is Mayor - Gordon Ramsey
Um... what?
It's like, he's trying to be funny, only instead of the audience being AWED BY THE SHEER FUNNY AND COMPELLED TO VOTE it's more like "[sarcasm]AHAHAHA[/sarcasm]. That's not very funny, you douche. Please die, k thnx. :|"
... And yes, I am extremely shallow for refusing to give the guy a chance just because of his appearance and sense of humour (Or lackthereof).
So it's the holidays, and the first thing I do on the weekend is work.
What a great way to start.
Working in retail has jaded my outlook on the very essence of humanity itself, yet thanks to it I've had time to reflect on my personal philosophy, moral issues and, to a lesser extent, improved my writing skills.
Anyway, that's not why I decided to post.
Partly the reason is that I haven't updated in a month or so, but...
.... Crap, let's just get on with this.
Around noon, a figure entered the store. It was a woman, appearing to be middle aged. She was of average stature and had an unkempt appearance. She wore a hood, and had smelled like paint.
All in all, she did not look like a pleasant woman.
She asked if she could use the phone for some reason or another. I didn't really listen, nor did I remotely care.
Politely, I replied that I could not allow it, as I am merely an employee. I certainly wasn't the one paying the phone bill, and I knew that the manager would have done the same thing.
She pretended not to listen in reply. With a bemused expression, she intelligently replied, "What?"
I repeated myself several times. Slowly and loudly.
She merely stood as she was, staring blankly and smiling disarmingly. Then she repeated her request to use the phone.
I shook my head and explained, yet again, that I was an employee and I had no power over using the phone.
She continued to stand, then began to rub her stomach, as if pregnant. This woman, I felt, was not going to leave until she used the damn phone.
Then, after a moment of silence, she muttered, "I could've used the phone by now."
She then repeated that statement more loudly so that I would hear her.
Slightly more irritated, I replied that I was unable to fulfill her request.
Looking more angrily, she said that she was pregnant and wanted to call her "Mum" to pick her up. Again, she repeated "I could've used the phone by now."
I sighed. "Is this phone call local?"
"It's a normal call. Just let me use the F**king phone."
I passed her the phone. Shooting me a slightly dirty look, she called.
She talked for less than a minute, then hung up with the same disarming smile she had before and thanked me.
She then stood as she was, and did not leave.
Feeling more and more nervous by the second, I asked if she needed anything else.
She extended her arm and shook my hand, then left.
I now have the urge to disinfect my hand. Repeatedly.
I am not getting paid enough to handle this crap.
ATTENTION EVERYONE:
For those who are interested in working in retail,
Think again.
Working in retail can (read: WILL) result in the employee:
- Losing faith in humanity
- Depressed
- Traumatised
If you still aren't convinced, here is an urbandictionary entry for the word Retail:
One of the shittiest professions...One that causes much depression, psychosis, anger, jealousy, frustration, and anxiety. It is extremely degrading. They never pay people what they are worth; the workers have to deal with a bunch of crap while getting paid peanuts.
That will be all.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME.
... Seriously. Today was a hectic day.
This morning I skipped breakfast to go to the National Archives, where I (hopefully) managed to gather enough information for my research project.
The study finished at 12, where I was subsequently kicked out of the building since it closed at the time.
I walked back to the shop, where my dad wanted me to work for about two hours.
When I arrived at the shop, I saw my dad running after someone.
Thinking it was some careless customer who forgot their wallet or something (This happens quite often), I went to the counter and watched the shop as usual.
When he returned, however, he brought back one of those huge teddy bears that everyone seems to have a fascination with and touches. And I know that he didn't take it with him when he ran.
Some bitch actually had the gall to steal a teddybear that is about as tall as a seven year old. I am serious.
After that, I had to deal with this idiot wannabe-shoplifter who tried to steal a cellphone when he thought I wasn't looking. And I was staring at him at that point.
When I told him to give me back the phone, he tried to "Explain" that he thought it was a phone.
Riiiiight.
Please tell me I'm not the only one who hates customers. Stupid, idiotic customers.
I am currently in the shop. Squeezing the stuffing out of a stress ball. While punching it at the same time. And gnawing at it.
Last night's dinner was.... alright. The only complaint I had was the fact that 'it' kept winking at me from across the table.
Me: *Looks across the dining room*
Ashley (a.k.a "it"): ;-]
Me: O_O!
The thing is, that wasn't the reason why I'm pissed at the moment.
When we were waiting for the car to arrive so we could go home, we had to wait for about 5 - 10 minutes.
It was the longest 5 - 10 minutes of my life.
This is basically what she said: (I've also added emoticons of how I felt with [].)
Ashley: I'm going to the year 12 ball. What should I wear?
Me: *Muttering* I don't care, I don't care, I don't care...
Ashley: Tell me~~~~~~~ (<-- Insert whiny tone)
Me: *Does a quick Google search on ball gown* HERE. THIS KIND. [>:(]
Ashley: *Points to a wedding gown* I want to wear that one.
Me: I DON'T CARE. LEAVE ME ALONE.
Ashley: But... You're my younger sister. I love you.
Me: WE'RE NOT EVEN RELATED! SHUT UP! [D:<]
Ashley: .... Are you angry?
Me: *In disbelief*
Ashley: Are you?
Me: (Sarcastically) No, I'm not angry, I'm just.... Happy.
Ashley: Oh. Okay.
Me: ....
Ashley: Do you know if Daniel* would want to go to the-
Me: NO.
Ashley: What?
Me: He says "Not even in your dreams."
Ashley: But... how did he know?
Me: I told him. Around last week.
Ashley: I was joking.
Me: (Didn't sound joking to me...)
Ashley: I want to lose weight~~~~~
Me: I don't care. [T_T]
Ashley: I've been eating nothing but fatty food and-
Me: I said, I don't care.
Ashley: ....
Ashley: You know your friend from... Vie... Viet..
Me: Vietnam?
Ashley: Yeah, that's it. In the Jazz band?
Me: ... She's from Malaysia.
Ashley: Huh? Oh, right. I'm so angry.
Me: ... What?
Ashley: I'm better than her at piano, but Ms Lee made me play fucking bass.
Me: You got kicked out of Jazz band, didn't you?
Ashley: Yes, but I told her, "I-
Me: Stopped caring. What makes you think you're better at the piano than my friend?
Ashley: She just... sucks. Ms. Lee is a bitch.
Me: ... *Eye twitches while looking extremely livid*
Ashley: The person below Ms. Holloway... Ms. Hippid?
Me: ... Hubbard?
Ashley: Yes, her. She's a bitch too. Mr. Reddy is nice though.
Me: (WTF?)
Ashley: *Abruptly changes the subject again* Hey, I've got three boyfriends.
Me: FOR THE LAST TIME, I DON'T CARE. [>:O]
Ashley: *Oblivious* One of them was like "Hey, sexy", and-
Me: (Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!)
Ashley: But I still want David*~~~~~~~
Me: Age. Difference.
Ashley: I like older men. [;-)]
Me: GRARGREGAAGSGGDSGG *Bangs head on table*
Ashley: ... Are you angry?
Me: *Notices the car is here* OUT. NOW. *points to door*
*Notes:
Daniel is my older brother. Who actually hates 'it' as much as I do.
David is an altar server dude who's like, 24 and already has a fiancee.
... She is most likely the most retarded, oblivious idiot I have ever met. Seriously. Even worse than that asshole who broke the display shelves made of glass.
For the record, I think I've managed to gain about 2 - 4 white hairs. And irreversable amounts of stress which will most likely go towards my inevitable stroke which will occur in the future.
Alright.
On Wednesday two students came to my house for homestay. My first impression of them was neutral. I didn't hate them, but I didn't really like them either. This was a good sign. However, last night changed all that.
Today, on Friday the Second of February, I am in an extremely pissed off mood at the shop with a virus-infected computer and a PS2 which lost 200+ hours of effort to look forward to.
Thursday night, 6:15pm. I got home from Morning Glory. I wasn't really happy or relaxed. Upon entering my room to do something on the internet (I cannot recall why I went in my room. It was something important, in any case), I find my Internet Explorer completely changed. Turns out that those bastard children of Sa kids decided to download stuff that I don't really need. Without my permission, no less. Using a quick virus check rewarded me with a message of a virus on my compy. This will take me a while to see what the hell has infected my computer and how bad the damage is going to be.
At around 11:30pm I cheered up because Daniel (My brother) showed me something on Youtube. If memory serves, it was about this comedian named Eddie Izzard. Anyway, I was getting ready to go to sleep, so I headed upstairs to where my "Temporary Bed" (Read: Couch) was. Then I noticed that something was terribly wrong. I did not remember putting the Playstation like that...
OH SHI-
Hurriedly, I turned on the PS2 and checked the memory card.
The sight made me even more livid than before.
I have completely lost the save data of:
- Tekken 5 (I had all the characters, plus I had several characters I worked hard on to become Tekken Lord)
- Dynasty Warriors 4: Empires (This didn't annoy as much, but I nevertheless spent at least 30 hours on it to clock the game completely)
Now, if I only just lost these two, it wouldn't have been that bad. But no, they had also deleted my precious Final Fantasy X file.
That was what made my blood boil.
Final Fantasy is an RPG game series created by the great Squaresoft (now Square Enix). Being an RPG game, Final Fantasy is LONG. Hell, the quickest time I spent beating one of them took at least 20 hours through extensive levelling and finishing side quests. And that one was a short game compared to the others.
Final Fantasy X is the longest game Square has made so far. Including side-quests and such, it takes at least 50 goddamn hours. I spent at least 100 hours on the bloody game.
This is why I don't let many people play on my computer/PS2/DS/etc unless they either know what the hell they are doing, or if I'm there.
So, what have I learned from all of this?
NEVER LET THOSE BASTARDS NEAR ANYTHING ELECTRICAL AGAIN UNLESS I'M NEARBY.
